The Kimistry Lab

Making the rounds.

2009-02-23T23:12:00.001-05:00

I feel like I'm at Gill again.

They're always looking for the black person for the brochure.

All I want for Christmas...

2008-12-20T13:57:00.003-05:00

Change is a-coming!

2008-09-12T07:56:00.003-04:00

A big life change is on the horizon.

The final decision has not been made due to a last minute opportunity.

In the meantime, enjoy some over the top grandstanding.

Wow.

2008-07-09T13:40:00.001-04:00

See? This is why I didn't like being on the MARTA.

clipped from www.youtube.com

ATL Hoodrat aka SOULJA GIRL goes crazy on the Marta!

Sabrina Bryan v2.0

2008-03-19T14:18:00.002-04:00

I'm in love with Mark Ballas!!!!

I loved this performance. I love Kristi Yamaguchi. I've promised myself that I wouldn't get all worked up after what happened to Team Sabrina last season. Oh Well.

Enjoy!

In other news:

Deam American Idol,

Did we really need another week of Beatles songs? People did the best they could last week. I did not need to hear a total of 23 Beatles songs right in a row. Really I didn't.

American Idol

2008-03-11T22:24:00.003-04:00

Question of the Day:

Was Ryan Seacrest more obnoxious than usual on Tuesday?

I've never yelled "Shut the hell up!" out of frustration with RYAN!

Maybe it was just me.

See! It does happen in real life.

2008-03-10T11:10:00.000-04:00

Angry Black Women

2008-02-28T16:52:00.002-05:00

This is the most insightful thing I've read all day.

SheCodes wrote about the Angry Black Woman. Her analogy is brilliant and brought me to a greater understanding of the world as I know it.

Please follow the link and read the entire post.

clipped from blackwomenvote.blogspot.com

Black American Women: What's the big deal?

What's the big deal? Why are you offended? It's a question that indignant black women are contantly asked in times like this. In America, and increasingly around the world, there is a prevailing assumption that many of American black women are just being ultra-sensitive, hyper-vigilant, and, well, generally "angry" for deciding to respond to ridicule, insults, and even salaciously veiled threats.

Two identical actions. Two very different reactions.

...the difference of public reaction and outrage is NOT due to the difference in importance of the actions, but the difference in the perceived value of the women who were insulted.

I'm so proud!

2008-02-25T23:06:00.002-05:00

I'm so proud of my dear friend Rhonney. Besides being the most determined and dedicated person I know, he also supportive and smart.

He is a creative genius.

Below is a promo clip of one of his plays. It Goes Unsaid has enjoyed productions in both LA and NYC.

Please watch and enjoy.

Lighten up!

2008-02-17T20:02:00.000-05:00

These kids are working it out!

Jeez. Now I'm Depressed

2008-02-17T12:48:00.003-05:00

You know, things really aren't that bleak. Yes it sucks to be invisible. It's frustrating as hell. I must say "Don't you see me standing here?!" several times a week.

Everyone wants to be acknowledged. That's human nature. It's American nature.

The further truth is that there are things I'm pretty happy with. When I look in the mirror, I'm happy to see the face/body staring back at me. Ok. I want to lose 10 pounds, but who doesn't? I still look great in my bathing suit. I'm happy with my accomplishments, even if my current situation isn't ideal, I know that I have the background and drive to make things better. If nothing else, I can sit down and play the piano and have a creative release.

The frustration comes when I eventually say to myself:

How come no one else sees what I see?

That's probably why I have so many gay friends. They are free to appreciate and share those things without the pressure of having sexual attraction (or lack thereof) attached to any expression of appreciation.

Who knows?

No escape: Not Woman Enough

2008-02-17T12:00:00.007-05:00

"And ain't I a woman?"

Racialcious guest contributor Tami wrote a very thoughtful post about how often people forget that black women are WOMEN too.

This post hit home for me because on my recent trip, I had an encounter with a couple from Italy. It was late at night and my travel buddy and I were out on the balcony having a quiet conversation as we enjoyed our last evening on the beach. First, the woman came out upset that we were actually talking, and then she sent her husband out. He proceeded to curse us out in Italian. He was screaming at the top of his lungs at 3AM. The people walking around the resort stopped to watch the situation unfold.

You know me. I don't stand for that kind of thing. I got up and walked away, but this guy proceeded to engage my friend in the end yelling "Fuck You!" in Italian.

In what universe does a 70-year-old man curse at two young ladies, who have really done nothing? We were not having a party, or laughing or playing quarters. We were whispering. Then it hit me. We are so low on the totem pole of social hierarchy, coupled with the fact that we were not even perceived as females, it was easy. We were not the same kind of human.

It is one thing to walk around the States and know the history and the struggle of black females in America. To know that this kind of prejudice is so ingrained in the culture that you just keep on keeping on because if you let it stop you there would be no living for all the anger. To engage with someone who does not share that history and to be treated the same way was:

HEARTBREAKING

That's life though.

Tami's words and the associated comments help me know that I am not alone in the struggle. I just don't know what that means. I cannot quite figure out why I care so much. Is it because I can't get a date? Is it because now that I am getting older I would love to have help hefting my 50lb suitcase into the car? Is it because half of my identity, the woman part, is largely ignored by society as a whole, and ignored by the men who look like me?

I talked about Damaged Black Men, but it seems that despite my efforts I'm heading straight down the path of Damaged Black Woman, and I don't have negative relationships with men to blame for the damage, this happened just by living.

Whatever. The good part about being a woman is having hope. Perception of black women cannot be this dismal forever. Can it?

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-14T22:47:00.001-05:00

HOPE

I love this picture.

I think I can do this....

2008-02-08T22:26:00.000-05:00

There is an interracial dating blog that I've been following. I initially found this site on some black guy's blog. He was rating that Evia and Halima hate on black men by calling them DBR (Damaged Beyond Repair).

Black Women's IR Circle is quite interesting. I don't know where I stand on the issue of dating outside the race, but the ladies bring up some great points. The idea that really resonates with me is that in terms of sheer numbers, by limiting myself to black men only, I'm setting myself up for a bit of man-sharing.

Not an option!

The thought that follows is that eligible black men who are willing to date black women take advantage of the numbers and in turn shit on the black women who are "lucky" enough to date them.

Right now I'm just standing on the sidelines observing. Since I have issues, at this point I'd rather be by myself than date a DBR or a white man.

Whatever. This issue is so complex. The real reason for my post is the most recent discussion on Halima's blog. The title of the post?

Are black girls rapidly normalising the 'hierarchy' of who is worthy of love an companionship?

My heart stopped. The idea is so painful, but only because I know there is so much truth in the idea. Halima writes:

Are black girls rapidly normalising societies spelt out ‘hierarchy’ of who is loveable, worthy to be feted and whose hand should be sought in marriage. The sad thing is that I think our generation has a lot to do with this state of affairs, by being inert and refusing to unequivocally counter any campaign to declare us unlovable, and unviable as partners. We just stood their and took it, no doubt complaining, but still in essence ‘taking it’. There was no real and practical response when it was being declared that ‘it is good that bw should be alone”.

An interesting thought.

Halima continues:

I must add that 'complacency', 'indifference', 'apathy', 'shrugging of shoulders' is becoming a very big barrier to rooting out misogyny and anti-bw sentiments in our community, because bw themselves become indifferent to and even content to wear the chains placed around their necks and even celebrate these as ‘happy garlands’.

What about the issue of non-bboys ignoring bgirls. Do you think they are internalising this sentiment from seeing that bboys don’t even give fellow bgirls (apart from the near white ones), the time of day? And thus, are bg becoming invisible to them or are they absorbing this from general societal sentiments that have declared that bw are not serious relationship/dating material?

OK. These words are difficult to read. While I'm nodding my head in agreement, inside I'm screaming "What the hell were we supposed to do instead?!" How were we not supposed to alienate the few black men who would associate with us? How were we not supposed to seem different from the stereotypical black women when faced with some white women who wanted to sex up some black man? If I responded to everything that hurt my ego or my chances for dating, I would have nothing positive to say in any social situation.

I guess I'm willing to take the blame. That's what black women do, isn't it? Take the blame for every social ill that plagues the black community. This time, however, it is our fault, and DIRECTLY impacts our daily lives.

Now I'm off to read the comments. I'll probably want a drink by the time I'm finished.

ETA --This is one of the first comments:

It's a shame.

Black girls have been watching all the while black women have been degrading themselves by wasting their time, resources, energy, and youth with undeserving damaged beyond repair black males.

Black women have taught black girls by example the lie that their undesirable and must be content with this situation.

Another poster writes:

what really use to annoy me was knowing how so many young black girls in general would take their white female friends around black males in black casual and group settings (mostly in the states). It's as if some black girls are now actually part of the program to their own demise.

La~ this is what I meant when i said that I am often times get confused by bw strong need to be magnanimous and open minded in a world that is utterly unfair to them. In a sense like you, I think this does point to the fact that they accept their subordinate position and as you say are going a step further to actually facilitate it!

Guilty Again. I don't know that I've ever invited a white friend to a black casual setting, but if pressed by a friend, I'm often reluctant to say I don't want to bring them because they are white.

Jeez.

Looks like I'm going to want that drink to get through the comments...::sigh::

How many times has this happened to you?

2008-02-08T21:20:00.000-05:00

This video is hysterical.

(hat tip: Racialicious)

The real problem with classical music

2008-02-07T12:39:00.000-05:00

[A] young woman, sat down to Schumann, bending her back, lifting her head
and gazing straight up. Maybe God was sitting in the rafters just above her, and
she was using the opportunity to say hello. Both pianists were perfectly fluent.
They kept time, played the right notes and sounded expressive when they were
supposed to.
...lugubrious gymnastics like these advertise the feelings of performers, not of Beethoven or Schumann. Music is asked to stand in line and wait its turn.
Our two pianists might simply have been talking themselves into playing well and sharing the conversation with us. Maybe they didn’t trust their own ability to make music without a little theater to juice up the proceedings. Elaborate arm waving and heaven-bound gazes, at any rate, seem to have become part of the conservatory curriculum, like accurate scales and counterpoint.

I think Holland is missing something essential. This isn't about the performers stepping aside to let the music stand on its own, to let Beethoven or Schumann shine. This is about how people get a chance to perform in an expressive manner in much the same way that artists of other genres do. Now that classical music isn't reserved for the record player and to the elite in a concert hall...now that everything is televised and wild gesturing is a part of today’s performance currency, why do we expect differently. An audience that consumes MTV and BET expects a bit of showmanship.

What would make watching some stoic guy on television playing Bach be more compelling than watching my favorite rap star command the stage with lyrics and dance? Take away 20 years of music training and there is no way I’d be turning on Great Performances. With Emmanuel Ax’s style of performance that put me to sleep in no less than five minutes or Glenn Gould’s strange habits including moaning and humming through the Brandenberg Concerti; a little change in style of performance is right up my alley.

Granted, I have not seen the competition that set Holland in motion. There has to be middle ground. There has to be a way “classical” music can still appeal to contemporary musicians and audiences. I just don’t see how we are supposed to dismiss the performer who has got the camera’s focus and just concentrate on the music as if the performer doesn’t exist. I believe those days are over.

That's Entertainment

2008-01-21T00:13:00.001-05:00

I interrupt my constant bitching with a moment of pure entertainment.

Sabrina and Drew are the most entertaining non-pros from Dancing with the Stars.

Oh Mary J.

2008-01-16T12:13:00.000-05:00

Normally I'm screaming at Mary J. Blige to GTFOMTV!

Not today. I ran across this little gem on You Tube.

I LOVE tall-ass David Gregory!

I'm about to take a break from the election

2008-01-16T12:04:00.000-05:00

This is an exciting week for me. American Idol just started Season 7.

We've done six seasons already? My how time flies. Anywhoo....

Before I get into my reality tv obsession I must share this little gem.

Melissa Harris-Lacewell debates Gloria Steinem, about her op-ed piece in the New York Times last week.

Click here to watch or listen.

Two words come to mind: Feral Cats

2008-01-15T00:15:00.001-05:00

clipped from thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com

feral

• adjective 1 in a wild state, especially after escape from captivity or domestication

Food for thought

2008-01-11T11:15:00.001-05:00

clipped from www.slate.com

Cos and EffectBill Cosby may be right about African-Americans spending a lot on expensive sneakers—but he's wrong about why.

Many in the black community have been critical of Cosby for blaming poor people rather than poor public policies.

But notably absent from the Cosby affair have been the underlying economic facts. Do blacks actually spend more on consumerist indulgences than whites? And if so, what, exactly, makes black Americans more vulnerable to the allure of these luxury goods?

Charles, Hurst, and Roussanov argue that it's because blacks and whites are seeking status in different communities. In the racially divided society we live in, whites are trying to impress other whites, and blacks are trying to impress other blacks. But because poor blacks are more likely to live among other poor blacks than poor whites are to live among other poor whites, poor black families are more susceptible to being pulled into a signaling game with their neighbors.

This whole article is thought provoking and interesting.

Read the whole thing here:
http://www.slate.com/id/2181822

Generalizations are never a good thing

2008-01-10T03:40:00.001-05:00

Gordon from We Are Respectable Negroes responded to yesterday's rant.

I started to respond in the comments section, but I was so long winded...So here it is.

Between listening to the WAOD podcast this morning and reading MANY ignorant comments on Dear Black Man, my blood was boiling.

I wrote this post early in my day and dashed off to work. During the drive, I started thinking that:

1. My father doesn't make me tired. At all. He's been nothing but supportive of my mother and me my whole entire life. I'm a child of a non-deserter BM. I was guilty of the compartmentalization that I often accuse men (of all races). How can I attribute such a negative thing to a large group of people, and completely discount the most important people in my life?

2. My black male friends don't make me tired. Oh, wait. Sometimes they do. Moving on...

3. All black men don't make me tired. Actually, that's quite a ridiculous idea, especially given that I do not know all black men.

Gordon says:

The way some of these folks talk, black men who are openly hostile to professional black women and who only date white women are the majority. That's so far from the truth that it's crazy. If you see these types of black men everywhere you look, the problem is with your filter.

I don't actually think these men are the majority. Even if they were, I only deal with these people in passing because I make it a point to keep them at arms length. My real problem is that culturally, black women are being held to a double standard.

I have no problem supporting the causes of African-American men. I believe a crime against one is a crime against all (including black on black crime, but that's another discussion entirely) It just seems that black women are constantly being asked to support men at the expense of their own well-being and self-esteem and anyone who challenges an idea has an attitude. We're being told to sacrifice ourselves in one breath and then we're being told that we are not worthy as women in the next breath.

My mother says this is nothing new in America (then she brings up the Civil Rights Movement). This is simply new to me.

...as I write this, I see parallels in the Democratic Party and the black community. hmmm......

Powered by ScribeFire.

We are respectable negroes putting it down again.

2008-01-09T20:49:00.001-05:00

I thought this was an interesting post. My father and I had a similar discussion this morning.
clipped from wearerespectablenegroes.blogspot.com
Gordon Gartrelle says: The Democrats refuse to see the Wizard

The fact that she is a Clinton is what’ll ultimately sink her. Feeling good about New Hampshire women coming to bat for their girl? That's nice. Feel this: do you know how many conservative and moderate women will come out to vote, not for a Republican, not against a Democrat, but against Hillary personally? People will crawl from the swamps to ensure she never sets foot in the White House again. If this is fairly obvious even to party loyalists, why are the rest of the Democrats so blind? I think it’s a collection of things: cowardice, strategic and ideological stagnation, an insider devotion to the status quo, and the all too predictable establishment liberal mantra, “White is right (to lead black people), black is awesome (but if it comes down to white vs. black leadership, black get back).

Black men make me tired

2008-01-09T10:36:00.000-05:00
Ok.

I have to get this off my chest. This morning, I came across two websites that really got my blood boiling.

First.

What About Our Daughters

I go back and forth about how much I enjoy this website. At times I find the women screechy and I don't know that I actually agree with all of their messages and tactics.

What attracted me to them initially was the portrayal (and betrayal) of black women in the media. I wondered what we were teaching our children about the value of black women.

Every week they do a podcast with black bloggers on blogtalkradio.com. This week they discussed the New Hampshire primary returns.

Second.

I came across Dear Black Man: I'm Not Angry, I'm just mad as hell .

Intriguing.

The website features stories about ways black women can relate to black men in a more meaningful manner.

Nice. I guess.

After further review I discovered that it's not black women who are mad as hell, it's the black men.

The site features an open letter section where black men can air all of their tired laundry.

How are these two things connected?

Well, on this week's WAOD roundtable a caller decided to voice his concerns with the fact that these ladies were not Obama supporters. This was a surprise to the ladies because they are not against Obama, they are just trying to figure out the best candidate for them will be.

The caller (a black man) asserted that all black women should be supporting Obama, we should put our gender aside because that is not important and that Obama needs to be our choice because he is the first viable black candidate. Professor Tracy took issue with the request that she forget her gender to support a candidate that might not be best for her well-being. Another blogger then challenged Mr. Black Man to explain the issues that Obama supported that would positively change their lives. (I'm paraphrasing). Mr. Black Man could only come up with He's not Jesse, he's not Al, he's not Shirley Chisholm. Then he was asked what issues make him, (Mr. Black Man) support Obama. Same story. First black man as president.

hmmmm.......

As this was going on in the background I was reading this:

...Now she wants to be independent instead of us teaming up to build a dynasty. I really feel that BM woman wants to lead the BM and control all aspects of black life. More times than not when a BW acheives socalled success there was a man in the picture to help make it happen. The BW wants her own materialism. Once a BM has been burned in this way he very seldom ever trust another BW. Do BW hate BM? I actually have been able to build my businesses successly with out her. I never would have beleived that she was the one whom did want me to succeed because she wanted her own recognition. Now she now one the 70% of BW looking for a good man.

Here's my thing, I feel like everywhere I turn, I read/see/hear something that speaks to the problem with black women:

1. We're too educated
2. We're too outspoken or we have an attitude
3. We're too independent (A condition caused by the abandonment of the black family en masse by black men, even if you weren't a victim of said loss, you still consume it as part of the culture at large)
4. We don't care what happens to men now because we have so much for ourselves.

All of this is usually followed by "Who are you going to date now, you've got so much for yourselves now your all alone. Ha!" or "Welcome to the 70% of black women who are unmarried!"

Well now wait a second. If you really don't care about us, and we don't deserve your attention, and you're better off with out us and that's why you only date white women, then why do you need us to vote for Obama without questioning his position?

Why do you need us to not have our defenses up when you step to us in the club or at the bar?

Why do you need us to support you financially when the going gets tough?

Why do you need us to subvert all of our goals and aspirations just so that we can make YOU FEEL LIKE A MAN? Act like a man! Are you a man? Why is that not enough? Why must black women act like sub-humans in order for us to be feminine?

Why, after all of this screaming that we aren't good enough, that we aren't worthy, that we aren't pretty, that we are worthless; are we supposed to support what any black man does, just because they are a black man. This is not a two-way street, and I resent expectation. (Oh I could go on and on about expectations).

I'm done.

My Froggy Carr Obsession

2008-01-08T14:34:00.001-05:00

This is the Mummers group that the kid in my police brutality photo belonged to. Clearly. They. Like. Beer.
clipped from williampennmanship.blogspot.com

Froggy Carr to star in new Coors Light commercial
The company was so very impressed by the groups consumption of the beverage on New Year's Day that Pete Coors, president, flew in to personally make an offer to its captain
"What can I say, Froggy Carr likes Coors Light," said Mummer, Franky Cavanaugh.

My continued obsession with race.

2008-01-08T12:53:00.001-05:00

I know that I'm supposed to hate Shelby Steele. I just can't get over the fact that I agree with 89% of what he just said in this interview.

(I hate Fox News...That has NOT changed)

Hat tip to We Are Respectable Negroes. One of my new favorite blogs.
clipped from wearerespectablenegroes.blogspot.com
You know what? A broken clock is right twice a day.

In the words of The Bitch

2007-10-16T02:44:00.000-04:00
In the words of bell hooks, "I will not have my life narrowed down. I will not bow down to somebody else's whim or to someone else's ignorance."

On Sunday Julia made me watch Meet the Press. First let it be known that I can't stand Tim Russert. Second, I must say that I am tired of listening to Bill Cosby, even if there is some truth to his complaints.

I muddled through the hour. Twice. The non-interview (because Russert didn't say much) gave me food for thought.

Bloggers weighed in on the discussion and Angry Black Bitch (linked on my Blog Roll Call) posted a great response.

I will leave this one to The Bitch.

A-kimmie's Heel

2007-10-09T23:59:00.000-04:00

wan·der·lust
Pronunciation: 'wän-d&r-"l&st
Function: noun
: strong longing for or impulse toward wandering

As I walked into my office building today, I was overcome with ennui. I felt it as soon as I opened the door.

Ennui.

I even mentioned it to Julia. (Her response was "what are you talking about?!")

All day long, my personal soundtrack ran through my mind. I could hear my mother saying:

-"No matter how far you've gone down the wrong road, turn back."

I can hear myself telling a co-worker:
- "You haven't even given this place a chance. How do you know it's time to go?"

My friend Philip is yelling:
-"You need to have a job with no responsibility for awhile. Take the money, figure out what you really want to do, and then RUN! Literally. "

Well, I have said job. There are responsibilities (that I do not like), but the salary is high enough for me to do the job just for the money. There are relationships and events at work that make me uncomfortable. The alarm in my head started out small and quiet, now I cannot hear anything else. I'm trying to suck it up, while I desperately come up with a game plan. My problem is, all of this wandering has taught me a bit about what I should not be doing, but I still do not know what I should do instead.

Since I have no one to answer to (no kids, no spouse, no boyfriend) it is quite simple for me to pick up and leave town. But why? I have other goals: I would like to be in a relationship, I would like to have children one day; I would like to have a hobby as a hobby, not a hobby as a career. For the past 2 years, I have been trying to figure out how to make "settle down" happen without much success. I tried staying past my comfort zone, and that turned out to be a disaster. Maybe this is still my time to wander, even if I am getting old.

David Brooks says that I am in the odyssey life phase. Somehow, I am chasing something that doesn't exist. What is that something? What am I chasing that I cannot achieve? If I can figure that out, I bet I will settle down.

Since you asked...

2007-10-07T09:33:00.000-04:00
Here we go again.

I came across this letter on Salon.com. Here's yet another 30-something black woman who can't get a date.

I'm tired of thinking about this. I'm tired of reading about this. I really just want to give up. I think it's time for me to accept the fact that I won't be meeting anyone, I won't be dating anyone, I won't be marrying anyone. By the time I recover from this latest round of frustration, I will be well past my expiration date.

I'm never going to be one of those "fast" hyper-sexual women who exudes the promise of sex at every turn. I'm finished being forward, it just never works out for me. I'm tired of letting the man be a man, that usually turns into some controlling/borderline abusive situation.

For now, it's me, the dog, and the tivo. Occasionally I can visit my friends who've had the good fortune of finding a companion. Maybe I'll make some new friends.

As for dating?

I'm done.

(whew....that reads more bitter than I thought I felt)

Just when you think you have nothing in common

2007-10-06T00:42:00.000-04:00
I learned something very interesting at work today. Just when I thought this person could not be any more different, I learned we have similar misgivings.

After careful thought, I realized that we are still very different, but my feelings aren't way off base.

Here's a little piece from SNL. This reminds me that everyone suffers from workplace headaches.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life...

2007-10-04T13:03:00.000-04:00
Now that I have a new (full-time permanent) job my blog will focus on my latest obsessions: race and the anti-racist movement, the abundance of negative stereotypes of black women portrayed in the media, and reality television. Cheetos Rock! Have you seen Sabrina Bryan on Dancing with the Stars?

Here is a clip of Bryan on the dance floor:

(Go to 2:21 for the beginning of the dance)

The Resurrection

2007-06-22T12:35:00.000-04:00
I'm slowly beginning to come out of hiding. I'm recovering from the disaster my life has become.

Most of the ruin is from my personal poor choices. Some of the ruin is from believing in people who don't believe in themselves, people who dealing with internal demons running away from the messes they've created. Well. I can relate to that can't I? While I sympathize I don't need to be witness to the madness, this time I must exercise a little self-preservation. Some of my destruction comes from my ability to see the potential in things...the other side of struggle can be glorious. Not everyone is strong enough to make it through the hard times and sometimes I need to learn the art of giving up or moving on.

Moving on...

All You've Got To Do Is Dream

2007-03-05T12:00:00.000-05:00

Shooting at the Olando Ale House

2007-02-06T12:32:00.000-05:00
Anyone who has worked for Walt Disney World has probably made at least one trip to this bar and restaurant, so when Julia sent me the link to this article I was stunned.

Well, it was never the nicest bar in the world, but it's shocking all the same.

Procrastination

2007-02-05T20:54:00.000-05:00
I have so many thoughts about Dreamgirls that I can't begin to write a coherent blog post about the movie.

From the Jennifer Holiday controversy to Jennifer Hudson's Oscar nomination there is so much to say about this movie.

There were parts that I loved, including Ms. Hudson's performance of "And I am Telling You". I have never experienced a show stopper in the movie theater. In my opinion, Hudson's performance took me on a greater emotional journey than Ms. Holiday (of course, I was five when I saw Jennifer Holiday live, but with the power of You Tube, my memory has been refreshed.) For me, the movie recording of "AIATY" and "Dreamgirls" replace the original cast album as the definitive versions of these songs.

That's all for now. Maybe I need to view the movie a 6th time.

Here's my list of things to watch:

"One Night Only" on BET.

In the spirit of the new season of American Idol check out my favorite JHud performance:

My favorite contestant so far this season, I laughed hysterically at this audition:

If you are tired of singing check out Baxter's diary as he visits the grandparents while his mom works a crazy schedule.

Questions of the week:

(This is for the theater heads)
Is it ok for me to be bitter about Grease: You're the One that We Want? Of course I'm watching it, but when will America have enough of the NEXT blonde girl with a mediocre voice realizing her dreams of stardom? Never? Am I the only person interested in seeing how they cast the rest of the show? (Rizzo anyone?) To me Sandy and Danny are the least interesting people in Grease, and further, every school in America has done a production of Grease, does it really matter who lands the lead role? Trust me, the Broadway core audience, is not going to be paying off local drug dealers to get the hot tickets for this production.

::stepping down from the soapbox::

A break from Dreamgirls

2006-12-30T09:10:00.000-05:00
In the meantime, enjoy some SNL humor.

Reality on TV

2006-11-11T01:28:00.000-05:00
I've taken a break from blogging about Dancing with the Stars because we're going into a finale with Mario and Emmitt and I am knee deep in reality television heaven.

Team Hispanic Against Team Black...The New American Reality.

Since I'm on the subject of American realities, I hope everyone is watching Ugly Betty. Sure it's melodramatic and the title is intimidating, but it is a great show. The exploration of race and class often makes me think about the show for days afterward. For instance, on Television Without Pity people are slowly starting to recognize that Vanessa Williams character, Wilhelmina, is more qualified than the wayward son of the owner of Mode. Wil, the opposite of Ugly Betty because she is beautiful, fashionable, and comes from a well-to-do family, is also similar to Betty because she is a minority and intelligent, and that automatically takes a back seat to bloodlines. Ugly Betty is based on a telenovela, "Yo soy Betty, la fea". Telenovelas by nature are overly dramatic stories of women of the underclass crossing barriers into the wealth class. It will be interesting to see how ABC handles the tough issues. Immigration? Did ABC really want to go there? Whatever. You can catch the last four episodes of Ugly Betty on ABC.com.

The other thing I watched last night was "Soulmates", a documentary on the realities of black women and marriage. Lately, all of my conversations have been about the lack of suitable people to date and marry. While I have the discussion with both black and white friends, the tone is often different. The white unattached women seem to date on a consistent basis, regardless off how attractive they are. They also seem to think that they will eventually find someone. Which is very different from my black female friends who aren't in long-term relationships. The unpaired people seem to feel like they've missed the boat, and are trying to come to terms with the idea that they will be single for the rest of their lives. "Soulmates" echoes that sentiment, and encourages women to figure out how they will deal if they are never married (they encourage being completely wrapped up in your relationship with God.... it was Clean Heart Productions after all.)

Where does that leave me? I haven't given up hope. Once I'm finished working 20 hour days, I will begin doing some of the silly challenges I see on all my reality TV shows, some of those people seem pretty homely, maybe all I need is a little extra effort. I'll also see if I can recruit other people to join in. I'll post the results on my blog.

My first hurdle is overnight rehearsals; I'm not attractive at all on 10 days of no sleep.

What a Week!

2006-10-18T22:39:00.000-04:00
This was a big reality TV week with Sara Evans' departure and the non-cliffhanger on Dancing with the Stars. Was anyone really shocked that no one went home and the scores would be combined?

I didn't think so.

Even though the Sara segment was boring, Jerry Springer's performance brought the drama.

While tonight's Dancing with the Stars wasn't a surprise the Project Runway Finale certainly was.

Jeffrey? Jeffrey? Not even Uli? Jeffrey?

I don't know why I put myself through this. I feel like I did when Carrie Underwood won American Idol. How underwhelming.

Now I'm looking forward to a happy hour of Ugly Betty where I can experience Queens NY without having to speak to a native.

Long Overdue

2006-10-14T11:07:00.000-04:00
For those of you following Dancing with the Stars, follow the link to some breaking news:

Willa and Max were voted off Team White's island, however Sara Evans has decided to leave the show after filing for divorce. This comes as a big relief to those who were bothered by the fact that this lackluster dancer remained in the competition while better competitors went home week after week. Will they bring Willa and Max back? I hope not, even still that's a small price to pay to see the Delay endorsed non-dancer gone.

In other Dancing with the Stars news, Jimmy Kimmel uncovered Team Hispanic in a Swashbucklin' production number:

Knowing how to spot can make anyone look like a professional dancer. If you are sick like me and review the video multiple times, you will see that Mario is sorely lacking in turn out and pointed toes. I'm further convinced that his participation in Dancing with the Stars is fair.

If you want to view more Kids Incorporated clips go to www.kidsincorporated.us.

Celebrity Duets
Well.... that was short lived. Jai was ousted and the only "singer" left in the competition was Alphonso.

Take a look at the ever-popular Lucy Lawless. The only word that comes to my mind is FARCE.

Take a look for yourself the madness begins 1:10 into the clip.

I found another one!

2006-09-17T10:27:00.000-04:00
I stumbled across another reality tv show!

Celebrity Duets is now on my calendar. First I saw this video of Little Richard.

Initially I wrote this show off, then I saw this clip of Queer Eye Jai:

I couldn't resist, one last vid of our little Tap Dance Kid...Carlton Banks all grown up:

Life is good.

I'm Back

2006-09-14T20:29:00.000-04:00
Reality TV is back and so am I.

Let me start with Survivor: Race Wars.

With all of the hoopla over Mark Burnett's latest ratings stunt, I figured I would tune in to Survivor. How could I miss an opportunity to cheer on my own kind? So. Congratulations Mr. Burnett, you got me to tune in to the season premier. Here’s the thing:

I'm a reality TV junkie who hates Survivor, I don't care how many blacks you throw off the slave ship; I still don't like the show.

I've been watching for 30 minutes and I've already seen the black people take a break, the white people act like sluts, and the Asians lay healing hands on each other.

...And the contestants had hopes that this show would dispel some stereotypes.

How naive.

Moving on to Dancing with the Stars

First-
Let's hear a big “Peace Out Bow Tie Bitch” to Tucker. Although his performance was truly funny, I can't support someone that asinine in his day job. If you missed it, see below, pay close attention to Tucker's face.

Second-
Joey Lawrence was kind of hot in a grungy way, so different from his Blossom persona.

Finally-
Since Survivor Race Wars is not working out for me, I think I will play Dancing with the Stars: Race Wars.

For the Black Team:
Emmitt Smith-his ease on the dance floor, cool calm, and lucky pairing with Cheryl Burke make him a great contender. He single-handedly made viewers forget about Master P (aka "Club, Club, shuffle step, Club”) and Jerry Rice (charming but bad).

Vivica A. Fox (Yes Jomal, I know you love her name)-
Vivica was poised and elegant as any black lady over 40 should be on television (take note Mary J you have 3 years to figure it out), and she also demonstrated the requisite amount of rhythm for the race to support her in this competition.

Monique Coleman-
I had such high hopes for her because she was in High School Musical. Sadly she lacked star quality. I guess I can throw her some race votes until the competition gets really stiff. Given the choice between her and Mario Lopez, I'd have to vote for the dimples, sorry.

For the Hispanic Team:
Mario Lopez seems to be the only contender, although it is entirely possible that I've overlooked someone who identifies as Hispanic. Either way, Mario's performance was very strong and he will take Team Hispanic to the top 3. (I hope)

The White Team:

Tucker- already gone. Thank heavens.
Jerry- Too cute. Jerry is adorable in a way the George HAMilton could never be. I don't know how long Jerry will be around, but he can't dance so who cares.
As for the rest of the actor/beauty queen Caucasian pack it will be interesting to see who emerges as their strong dancer. Willa perhaps?

Project Runway:

I love Michael Knight. Carry on.

On a lighter note-

For your viewing enjoyment, the ultimate reality show. The local news:

Update

2006-06-09T22:10:00.000-04:00
I still need to post about the month of May. For now, I'll give a quick update.

1. Baxter. He came into my life when he was merely seven weeks old. He cried through the night, had to relieve himself all day, and when I wanted to be up, he was sound asleep. I imagine my experience is a fraction of what new mothers go through. With that in mind, I may never have a baby.

Although I lack sleep, Baxter is adorable. I love the dog and my parents love him even more. I’m beginning to feel bad about denying my parents grandchildren…. just a little.

2. Currently I'm experiencing a mild crisis. Now that I've completed #4 on my "Pre-30" list, I feel it necessary to have a fulfilling job. My next gig is ending in 7 weeks and my lease in a different city is up in 7.5 weeks. Beyond that, I have no idea what to do with myself. The one thing I seem to know is that I must have my bed.

3. Lya's Fringe Festival production of Fantasy, Girl is coming along. Please pray that we all maintain our sanity. You can check out the show's website at www.2littlepe ople.com.

4. Does anyone else watch Big Love on HBO? I realize that I carry my super-liberal artistic ideal of "live and let live" but Polygamy really pushes my limits. The show is well written and handles polygamy in the modern age. Sympathetic and humorous characters are well drawn and the viewer can forget that the lifestyle is by no means socially acceptable. There are disturbing plot points that really make me wonder how a non-Fundamental LDS would ever agree to subject herself-- and more importantly her children -- to a life of secrets and lies. If you haven't watched, the show can be seen On Demand through the end of the month. Trust me, you'll be riveted.

Question of the day:
Randal was booed on the Aprentice Finale this week. Does America know that their hatred for him is racially motivated? OR Are we all living in the dark?

May Flowers

2006-06-01T23:53:00.000-04:00
May has been a very busy month. I spent 6 days in the Sunshine State. I will be updating the blog to share all of my tales.

Another American Idol

2006-05-24T23:55:00.000-04:00
Taylor Hicks is the American Idol.

I will list my thoughts.

1. I'm glad Taylor beat Katherine. She dissapointed me with inconsistent performances throughout the season, and even better, Simon has no idea how to market Taylor.

2. Lisa Tucker is a star. I still can't figure out where she went wrong.

3. Mandisa can sing.

4. Prince is THE American Idol. I wonder if he has the same makeup artist as Little Richard...

5. Seeing the 6 males made me bitter about Gideon all over again. ESPECIALLY when Kevin (Chicken Little) sang.

6. Mary J? Please GTFOMTV. Why is her ghetto ass everywhere?

7. Regardless of what the "Claymates" say, Rueben is the Season 2 American Idol. Seeing Clay with his Beetles haircut, reassured me that America got it right in 2o03.

8. Puck 'n Pickler? Do you think it's a coincidence that Wolfgang's last name rhymes with Kelly's means of advancement.

9. Katherine's last dress was beautiful.

10. Taylor's song sucks. It sucked last night. Why the hell did they make him sing it again tonight? Didn't they watch the tape of Tuesday night? At least Taylor was smart enough to thank the whole entire world instead of singing the monstrosity.

Another season down. I can't wait for Thursday and the launch of "So You Think You Can Dance" Season 2.

AI Freak--Out!

Paris is Burning

2006-05-04T20:44:00.000-04:00
Paris is burning and so is Florida.

Congratulations Lya!!!!!

2006-05-04T20:43:00.000-04:00
One of my dearest friends has just recieved her thick packet admitting her into the New York Fringe Festival. She will be joining the company of Urinetown and many other Off-Broadway commercial transfers.

Congratulations! Another Spelman Alumn success story.

Burning the Midnight Oil

2006-04-21T04:11:00.000-04:00
As I sit in Butler Library at 4AM tying up loose ends that were almost impossible to complete on tour, I'm beating myself up for being so focused in school. I never want to write about unions EVER again.

A picture of the ceiling in the library. If I had a dollar for every time I looked up there, I wouldn't need this stupid MFA.

The infamous inflatable rat on the street. I just can't get away from the union issues!

Peace Out Peaches!

2006-04-04T16:31:00.000-04:00
I'm losing my mind. Let me count the ways:

1. My perfect poodle "Peaches" was adopted by another family.
2. I still have not heard from NYC, even though it has been a week since they called my references.
3. I'm beginning to think Audio Guy is crazy.
4. Two 6:30 AM call times on the day of and the day after the time change left me bitchy, whiney, bitter, and sensitive. I was ready to start packing boxes, leaving O-town in the dust.

I've calmed down a bit. Reality TV helps...sometimes.

Cheerleader Nation- Lexington looks lovely on television. The show is a nice reminder that people can have nice houses and pleasant lives without being millionaires. I don't know how I feel about cheering on my high school's chief rival. In any case, I'm enjoying the show.

The Apprentice- I don't know what to make of the Apprentice now that Brent is gone. Knowing how the other contestants treated Brent in the beginning of the season makes it hard for me to buy into any of the players...except for Roxanne. The reason I like her, has little to do with her being black. I appreciated the way she called BS on the scapegoating of Brent on more than one occasion and she made a good project manager. I know she's a lawyer, but maybe she should think about a career in advertising.

American Idol- Last week was such a let down. Lisa Tucker is gone, but I'm surprisingly ok with that. Watching her struggle to be a teenybopper when her voice is so much more mature was becoming painful to watch. Maybe I'll run into Lisa at the stage door next fall when we're both working on Broadway. (Don't wake me. I'm dreaming).

Questions of the day:
1. Is anyone else disturbed by the fact that Gabby and Carlos (Desperate Housewives) are so aggressively chasing a white baby?

2. Paris Bennett & Country Music-- Do or Don't?

Please MB?

2006-03-30T21:46:00.000-05:00
May I please have a puppy?

After researching dog breeds, I have decided on the predictable poodle. I've been to loving shelters and horrifying pet stores in search of my new companion. Monday, I took a drive and discovered puppy heaven. When I walked in, there was a poodle waiting for my love. I held her, and put her back in the pen.

As the days passed, I could not get that puppy off my mind. Today, I found my car headed in the puppy’s direction...35 miles away from my apartment. She rested in my lap, we played around the pen, and she loved to have her belly rubbed. I finally made myself leave after 45 minutes. This time? My heart hurt.

Will I get the puppy? I don't know at this point. She may be my subconscious attempt to connect with another life right now. Tonight? I'm in love.

That's my girl!

On Pins and Needles

2006-03-29T15:55:00.000-05:00
Every Wednesday around 5pm, I'm on pins and needles. Will I be pissed off when I find out whom America sent home this week? In fact, Julia sent me a link to a site that offers a download of speed dialing software, currently unavailable for Macs. If there are any PC users who read my blog you can download the software here.

Back to the pins and needles-Today’s pins have little to do with AI as everyone sucked last night and they all deserve to go home. Yes, I'm including Mandisa and Katherine McPhee. Today, I'm nervous about finding out if my life will change drastically in a month. If I were being honest, an offer or a rejection would be ok with me.

With a rejection, I will take an ego bruise, but I will have the sunshine, a nice new friend, and a nice new dining room table. An offer would mean returning to my support system. Being in the city allowed me to see all of the wonderful people who contribute positively to my life: family, friends, and career supporters. Throw in the sacrifice known as graduate school and I have a good argument for coming out of hiding.

We will see what happens. If I don't hear anything soon, I'm going to need a new manicure.

Question of the day:
Is it me, or is Lisa Tucker suffering under the weight of the judges crappy feedback?

New York again?

2006-03-27T15:37:00.000-05:00

My return trip to NY was longer, but colder. An emergency shoe repair on 3rd Ave, a quick run to Bloomies and dinner at the first place MB and I had a liquid lunch had me in the NY groove. Even though the audio guy was on my mind, and within 45 minutes of landing, I was having a shouting match with a public transportation worker, I felt like I was home.

Here are some photo highlights.

Barry and I Made it Through the Rain

2006-03-21T22:17:00.000-05:00
This morning my blog entry began like this:

Well-meaning people usually have all of the prejudices of non-well meaning people.

I left the apartment feeling like the world was an ugly place dressed with PC talk. I returned with a second interview and hope that I would escape some of the aforementioned people. Then I was treated to Barry Manilow on American Idol.

Barry’s weeks are always the strongest. He clearly follows the show and always knows the contestants’ strengths and weaknesses. He also knows how to put together an arrangement that will knock the socks off American viewers. The contestants who could sing were amazing (with the exception of Lisa Tucker).

To listen to my favorite performance of the evening click here.

So much to say....

2006-03-17T11:25:00.000-05:00
In the three weeks since my last blog post so many things have happened. I've had out of town visitors, blow ups at work, reality television dissapointments, and a whirlwind trip to NYC to pursue a forgotten job lead. Through all of these events, I've learned a little more about the world, and even more about myself.

Ten things I learned without a computer

2006-02-26T22:20:00.000-05:00
1. A new hard drive is nice the first time around, the second time it's a pain in the ass.

2. There's enough reality television programming to keep me occupied for hours.

American Idol

3. Paris Bennett please stand still. I'm tired of seeing you bop around my television and we haven't even reached the second week of American Idol voting. Please don't make me hate you.

4. This week the women sounded pretty bad.

5. The men were worse.

6. Singing a whole song in falsetto on live TV is NEVER a good idea.

7. Watching AI with a recording engineer is like dining at the Olive Garden with a chef. I'm going to let out a big "Shut The Hell Up!" on the blog, because I really enjoy his company...and when I said it to his face he ignored me.

Dancing with the Stars

8. This week Jerry Rice out danced Stacy Keibler. Either way, Drew Lachey deserved the win.

9. Even though I enjoyed Dancing with the Stars, did we really need a two hour finale? Couldn't we watch Drew win for an hour and then see Desperate Housewives?

10. Mary J. Blige, how do you keep getting invitations to classy events? GTFOMTV!

My 29th Birthday was also this week and I can count the birthday wishes on one hand. What a non-occasion. Well, except for that woman who had a heart attack in the theater while I was calling the show...and the 3 people who vomitted throughout the day. Actually, I'm not bitter at all. I made so much progress on the "project" I've been completely energized. Now the countdown to 30 begins. Here's what I hope to have accomplished by February of 2007.

1. Lose 30 pounds.
2. Purchase a home.
3. Complete my staged reading and have the full production underway.
4. Be a Columbia Grad. How's the thesis reading coming Steven?
5. Have local people to celebrate the big Three-Oh with.

We'll see how these things go. I've been making progress with items 3, 4, and 5 the past few weeks and it would be a dream if the 2nd 30lbs would come off as easily as the first 30.

Question of the day:

Do vocal acrobatics make up for poor intonation?

My Baby is back from the hospital

2006-02-26T19:10:00.000-05:00
1st my father then my computer. I have so many lab updates, hopefully I can get through them all.

Dates-Zero/Love-Infinity

2006-02-14T22:00:00.000-05:00

Happy Valentine's Day

Even though I have not been on a date in months, this post is about love.

To see my father come out of the Markey Cancer Center with a smile on his face was a surprisingly triumphant moment. It has been a rough two weeks, and my father made it through like a champion.

The even bigger champ in this whole scenario is my mother. We are not the most affectionate family in the world, however, seeing all of the work my mother put into caring for my father over the past eight months has squashed any doubt in my mind that my mother loves my father. Her attention to his needs, her wisdom of life as a cancer patient and survivor, and her vision of the big-picture, really touched me. In no way is the hard road over for the family, but my mother is a hero and we appreciate everything that she does (even the things she hates like cooking…. and cleaning… and serving. Friends you see the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree).

Thank you Julia for all that you do. I love you mommy.

-Your only child

On to less depressing things--

Michael Bugno/MB/CLH. Thank you for supporting me over the years. Your friendship makes my world a better place. Your encouragement, honesty, humor, and kick in the pants is always right on time. The person who ends up sharing your life and love will be the luckiest person in the world.

MB-
ILYLYMD
-balcs

Enough with the sap! Get the Brittenum Twins of my TV immediately! Since when does being a half talent and a whiney bitch get you ahead? Wait. Let me remember "life on the road" and rephrase. SHUT THE FUCK UP!

You know what? I don't even need to tell them to shut up, because after they went to jail they were dropped from the show. Listen up all you wannabe superstars: Whining at the beginning of your career only gets on people's nerves. I don't want to hear another excuse on American Idol. Show me how you succeeded eventhough the situation was unfair. Crocodile tears get no love here.

JoMAAAAL (tm Kenneth Green...yes the same one)

2006-02-06T23:44:00.000-05:00
Soleil's Dad left very touching comments in response to my 5AM Ramblings so I will respond directly on the blog.

You know it's funny. If I remember correctly, Soleil's Mom was in my African Diaspora and the World class. (Taught by a White Mormon named Dr. White...and maybe it was Chevonne not Shameika. but I digress.) How did our generation of Middle Class black women become uptight? We work hard to make the people who sacrificed for us proud; we work to create a new positive stereotype for the black woman; we've done all of this at the expense of exploring the side of our identity that exists behind closed doors.

Soleil's Mom makes me proud. Not only does she have an amazing education, career, and list of socially aware accomplishments, she's also managed to create a home with a beautiful baby with a loving (black) husband. She's living the American Dream, one that many young blacks (regardless of socio economic background) are convinced they won't achieve entirely, and your role in that makes me proud.

Enough with the sappy BS. I'm glad you saw a black sappy movie on opening weekend even though you need to prepare for the Oscars.

Oh yeah- I know we've had this discussion before, but YOU KNOW if Meik's hair looked crazy you'd be annoyed.

Crap!

2006-02-04T07:31:00.000-05:00
My alarm just went off, and I still haven't been to bed.

My 5 AM Musings

2006-02-04T05:12:00.000-05:00
It's after 5 AM and I'm still awake. I'm sure this post is going to be disjointed and crazy as hell, but what else am I going to do at this hour?

1. This for the ladies: If you suffer from intense menstrual cramps and you decide pop Midol all day long so you can seem somewhat normal, please remember that it is LOADED with caffeine. You may find yourself cramp free blogging the night away. You'll need to take the meds the next day to fight off your crabbiness due to lack of sleep.

2. People piss me off. I know that's nothing new, so I'll share my latest annoyances:

Issue #1
On Tuesday, The Washington Post did a piece on a study that ties political leanings to racial biases. (Deep Breath). Interesting, but the whole time I was thinking, "tell me something I don't know". Whatever. Then I stumbled across a link to an idiot's (namely Rick Roberts) blog with a response to the study. I'll just say, some people miss the point and I'll allow you to get pissed the same way I did. Enjoy.

Issue #2

Friday's Oprah featured the hilarious and now certifiable Dave Chapelle. This show was the most uncomfortable hour of television all week long. What happened Dave?

Issue #3
My love hate relationship with Television Without Pity and Starting Over must end. I'll agree, Iyanla does some pretty questionable things on the show, but the comments on TWoP have crossed over to blatantly racist and they make my stomach turn. The constant comparison of Vanzant's appearance to a donkey's is really beginning to make me mad. These people are just the type to really believe they have no racial biases. See Issue #1.

3. I saw Something New this evening. There were a few interesting things about this experience. The first was the email from MB with a synopsis asking if I was going. This is only interesting because I thought it was a movie for me/black women, I didn't realize that other people (especially gay white males) were interested in seeing this film.

I went to the movies alone and encountered the second interesting item. There were 4 other black women attending the movie alone. Hmmmm.... I must mention that by 15 minutes into the story the theater was packed with other black women, many on dates with black men.

There were three white parties in the theater, one was seated next to me and another was seated directly behind me. I don't know why that's interesting. It's 5AM whatever.

Now, let's talk about the movie. I could relate to Kenya in many ways.

1. She had a list of things she just "didn't do".

*So do I!

2. She had a list of qualities she wanted in a mate. (Employed, articulate, college degree, and black)

*This list doesn't seem too outrageous to me because it looks like my list. I guess the list is 3 items too long.

3. She was slightly anal retentive.

*You know, we've both got a lot of lists. I never thought of myself as AR, but people keep hinting that I might be.

Without giving the story away, I found the heroine to be sad and unsatisfied through most of the movie. On further reflection I wonder if I'm projecting my feelings on the movie. I'd be curious to hear what other people think.

I just ran across this review of the movie on salon. I believe the reviewer is white. There are a couple of things I would take Zacharek to task about, but this is the part that stuck out in my mind:

"Kenya is whiter than Brian is..."

You know where I'm going with that so I'll leave on a positive note. I LOVE Alfre Woodard! Between this and Desperate Housewives, she's moving to the top of my favorite actress list.

Disclamer: I am fully aware that I carry my own set of biases regarding race among many other things.

What a difference a day makes

2006-02-02T21:40:00.000-05:00

In 12 short hours, I received a new job assignment through April; I drove myself to the car dealership and picked up my baby. The cost was half of the estimate and Audi handled returning the rental car. What more can I ask for?

The only thing left is to get rid of my sickness so that I can actually visit my father in the hospital.

(Adding the picture is sick...I know)

Some Days Life Just Sucks

2006-02-01T23:53:00.000-05:00
I've been having a rough go of it for the past few days. Nothing monumental, just several annoyances poised to push me over the edge.

Let's start with my baby...my car.

After a wild goose real estate chase on Sunday, I left my dome light on in my car. Since I didn't have to go to work until 6:30pm on Monday, my first visit to my lovely auto was at 4pm. What did I find? A dim light on overhead, and a very dead battery.

It was raining, of course. No one had jumper cables (myself included). Finally, some guy and his girlfriend stopped to help. After two failed attempts to jump my car, I gave up, called Enterprise and got dressed for work.

While at work I noticed post - nasal drip that developed into frequent sneezing and slight misery. Julia and five people at work had the same exact thing. I vowed to go to the doctor on Tuesday. Would that be before or after I dealt with the car?

The doctor gave me meds, progressive sent out someone to unlock the doors (because fancy power locks, don't work without power, even if you use the key and not the remote.) The guy opened my doors, got the engine to turn over, but no fuel was going through and the car would not run. I needed a tow.

After 2 hours at the doctor, an hour waiting for the first service guy, an hour with the service guy trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with my car, and 2 hours waiting for the tow company of Frick and Overly Fried Bimbo my poor car was finally on his way to Audi. My father began his hospital stay and I was resigned to paying for the rental car for another day. Somewhere around 6pm, the fever took over and sent me to dreamland.

The dealership still has no idea what is wrong with my car that has been in their possession for over 24 hours and now I’m paying by the hour. My father is in the hospital all by himself after getting some strange treatment, and I’m feeling pretty guilty for a) feeling bad because I’m sick and things aren’t going my way and b) for not being with my dad right now as he goes through his scary treatments.

I hope that things will turn around soon. I’m finished ranting for now. I’ll do Oprah’s plan of remembering the blessings before bed.

Shout out to South Beach!

2006-01-26T01:13:00.000-05:00
Tonight the fabulous, beautiful and talented Carrie Hartman was on UPN's South Beach tonight.

OK.... Just her credit was shown tonight, but we are convinced that she will be on next Wednesday. (Any excuse to get my tail back over to Holland's big beautiful plasma television.)

Congratulations Carrie.

Congratulations!!!!

2006-01-18T00:22:00.000-05:00
Ding, ding, ding! Jomal wins the prize as my first friend to have a child.

Soleil Ariana Vailes was born on Wednesday.

Congratulations Jomal. I'm sure Soleil will bring you endless joy.

P.S. Your house looks beautiful.

Blah, blah, blah, pixie dust

2006-01-15T12:35:00.000-05:00
Click here for pictures of my Magic Kingdom friends.

The Happiest Place on Earth

2006-01-06T09:42:00.000-05:00
Over the past few months I was lucky enough to work with a great group of actors and musicians. These people were dedicated to their craft and to their families, in addition to being very happy at work. (A direct contrast to my previous work experience.) The next few posts will be dedicated to the people who make magic for 150,000 strangers a week, and made magic for me every day.

Way to go Martha!

2005-12-21T23:19:00.000-05:00
Dear Martha,

In 48 short minutes, you have shown me why Julia and I are the only two people in America watching your version of The Apprentice. Who knew that a competitive reality finale could be so underwhelming?

Take this opportunity to spend more time with your snippy daughter, and enjoy your garden. You are not a good fit for the reality television line up.

Continued Success.

A Reality TV Junkie.
P.S. Randal says hello.

I am so MAD at Donald Trump!

2005-12-16T08:19:00.000-05:00
I just have to get this off my chest.

IF YOU WANTED TO HIRE REBECCA AS THE APPRENTICE TOO YOU SHOULD'VE JUST DONE IT!

Beyond that, is it a coincidence that the only time you ask winner if the runner-up should be the apprentice too is when he's black?

Whatever. DT it's your show and you completely undermined the whole process by putting Randal on the spot. I'm proud of Randal for saying no. That's the kind of decision you would have appreciated in the boardroom. I'm just sorry that the Pollyanna viewers have forgotten the spirit of the show and now despise Randal because he fought for himself.

At least I'm not forced to hear Rebecca sing Christmas songs as evidence that she should've won.

A Dream(girl) Come True

2005-11-16T23:30:00.000-05:00

Some people play fantasy football. I play fantasy casting. My spring game? The new Dreamgirls movie.

I'm also a BIG fan of American Idol. During Season 3 there was a Wild Card finalist that really caught my eye. After seeing Jennifer Hudson's performances of Circle of Life and Weekend in New England I was convinced that I'd seen the perfect Effie White. When I heard the Dreamgirls film was finally going into production my wheels started turning. Ms. Hudson has more than just a great voice. She is confident in her singing, unapologetic about her physicality (and pleasant to look at). While grand on stage, she is still a little rough around the edges which is a great complement to the ever "worldly" Beyonce Knowles who has been slated to be Deena for awhile.

During the American Idol 4 finale in May, I had a conversation with George Huff (who was quite gracious considering I was one of many crazy fans) about the movie and how I thought Jennifer would make a perfect Effie White. We exchanged several "fabulous, fierce, and over" comments and he mentioned that she was having a hard time getting someone to see her. A few months later I heard from a reputable source that Fantasia was going to be assuming the Effie White role. I was crushed.

But tonight? I stumbled across Broadway World's announcement...Jennifer Hudson would star in Dreamgirls as Effie. I'm still dancing around the living room.

For your amusement, here is my fantasy Dreamgirls Principal List:

Effie White.....Jennifer Hudson*
Deena Jones....Beyonce Knowles*
Lorrell Robinson....Fantasia Barrino
Michelle Morris(The Stepp Sister who competed at the Apollo who was seen at the end of Act I wearing the dress)...Anika Noni Rose

Curtis Taylor...Jesse L. Martin (I believe Jamie Foxx is actually cast in this role)
James "Thunder" Early...Jamie Foxx (I believe Eddie Murphy is actually cast in this role)
CC White...Usher (or Chester Gregory from Hairspray if Usher is unavailable)
Marty...Alton White (of the ever effervescent James Alexander for that matter)
* actually cast in the movie in the role

I guess I won't be getting Jennifer to star in my project. She is going to want big money after this movie.

Click here to listen to Jennifer Hudson.

While I'm thinking about fabulous singers in musicals, a big congratulations goes to my fellow Spelmanite Maia Wilson who is currently in a featured role in the Color Purple. I have heard from several people that she is a part of one of the best elements in the show. I knew she was a star in school. I feel lucky to have shared a stage with her.

My dream bumper sticker

2005-11-15T21:21:00.000-05:00

My first impulse was to put this on my car. Then I remembered that I live in Jeb country. Maybe one of my blue state friends can purchase this bumper sticker.

george W bush - john F kerry -- Hmmmmm the only way you can be offended is if your mind is in the gutter.

http://dontblamemeivoted4kerry.com/

The best hour in reality TV history

2005-11-11T19:31:00.000-05:00
For those of you who enjoyed 2 weeks of Marguerite "God Warrior" Perrin, listen to the Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy: The Remix.... "Dork-Sided!"

You can also bid on your very own God Warrior.

Thank you Fox, first American Idol, and now Trading Spouses. Someone needs an award.

I thought my haircut was bad

2005-11-08T21:14:00.000-05:00

I ran across this picture of the Baltimore Hair Massacre (not to be confused with the Baltimore Email Massacre....never underestimate the power of 2).

Rosa Parks

2005-10-25T16:49:00.000-04:00
Rosa Parks died Monday night at the age of 92.

I saw her picutres and went surfing the internet for confirmation. Why did it take me a full five minutes to find a report of this American History Legend?

I'm not going there. It's alarming that's all.

Wilma

2005-10-25T00:19:00.000-04:00
First of all:

Thank you Natalie for calling me Sunday night and making me get supplies. My radio came in handy when I was without power.

Secondly:

I'm completely over CNN. Their coverage was heavy on hysteria and light on facts. I guess it made for good entertainment.

Before and After

2005-10-05T19:26:00.000-04:00

Little Shop Kim

Florida Kim

Enough Said.

August Wilson

2005-10-03T01:26:00.000-04:00
August Wilson died Sunday from liver cancer.

NY Times Associated Press Article

What is there to say?

Race this weekend

2005-10-02T23:38:00.000-04:00
Race has been on my mind all weekend. I'm sure my black friends will pull out the ADW textbooks and remind me that viewing the world through the lens of race is the norm for blacks in America and the dichotomy is something very few groups can identify with.

So Friday begins with a very subtle but mildly disturbing racial incident at work. The person who was on the receiving end of the prejudiced behavior probably didn't even realized it had gone on. I noticed it and I was PISSED. I try to believe the best in everyone but this person keeps showing ugly and evil on a regular basis. The very small thing on Friday turned sneaking suspicions into accepted reality.

Saturday, I experienced the positive side of racial divisions...pride. I went to celebrate a Spelman alum's new job. Reflecting on my own experiences at Spelman and the amount of resistance I experienced from faculty, staff, and fellow students over the choice to pursue a career in entertainment, I was truly happy to see another Spelman sister experiencing career success in entertainment.

Tonight, I got off the phone with one of my dearest friends in Atlanta. Her 21 year old son came home from prison today. I remember feeling such sadness when I learned that he was in jail. He is such a bright, respectful, caring, articulate, and likable kid it's so hard to believe he has become another statistic. As his mother struggles with finding the new place "mom" resides the life of her boy turned man, my militant mind can't help but imagine how his consequences would have been different if he hadn't been black.

What does any of this mean in the world? I'm still trying to figure it out. But I came across this piece in Salon that resonated with my whole entire weekend.

The wrath of Chipotle

2005-09-29T21:04:00.000-04:00
I spent all day being Helen Homemaker. It's funny what a brand new coffee table will inspire you to do.

Since my coworker Jeff Lindberg was on my mind, I decided to have Chipotle. I made it halfway through my burrito bol and decided to leave the rest for dinner.

Hours later, my internal dinner bell rang and I rushed to the fridge to enjoy Chipotle Part II. Greed made the refigerator door to close on my paper bowl, causing my delicious feast to fall on my newly hand scrubbed kitchen floor. Ha!

That's what I get for being so catty yesterday.

I'm not that shallow

2005-09-28T23:27:00.000-04:00
I just feel like posting because my previous entry is so shallow.

An update....Let's see.

Ugandaman is driving me nuts and I've officially turned into one of those women.

My mother and I had an awesome time in DC. Photos to follow shortly.

A former partner in crime, and the other half of the most meaningful relationship I've had with a man who is not my father, is getting married. At first I was upset, replaying events in my head. Finally, I mustered up the nerve to call and congratulate him.

The conversation resolved two very important things for me:

1. There was a reason we were such good friends. With the healing salve of time, I can place previous perceived injustices in a box and remember why he was my closest friend for several years.

2. My needs as a woman pushing 30 are quite different than my needs were at 23. As great as he is, if my friends introduced us now, I would never go after a relationship with him. I'm enough drama for two people, who needs to add an actor to the mix?

Well, maybe that's not entirely true. He is fine. However, right now I have my sights set on a banker, or a lawyer, or an accountant, or a contractor (I have a thing for tool belts), or someone who isn't determined to have a smoking career in entertainment. That's my schtick, and someone needs to buy the Dior and 7 jeans when I can't.

On a lighter note, I've lost 24 pounds and my hair is growing just fine.

hmmmm.......I wonder what the health curriculum covers in Uganda.....

Damn. Still shallow.

I am so upset

2005-08-30T09:44:00.000-04:00
I went to get my hair done yesterday.

The stylist offered me a trim. I told her I had one less than a month ago. She responded that it was a little jagged up top, but everything else looked fine. She would just do a little at the crown. I agreed.

Silly Me. This woman cut an inch off all of my hair (which wasn't that long to begin with) stating that she didn't know what the last person did, but she thought it was uneven. Now I can't pull it back at all and the ends hit right where I sweat. I work outside. I go to dance class. She couldn't have given me a WORSE haircut.

I've never really been this up in arms over hair, becuase it will grow back, but this time I'm PISSED!

I guess that's what I get for going to the salon on the day when most salons don't operate.

...and now...I'm off to work to swat at my neck all day.

An Interesting Sunday

2005-08-28T23:34:00.000-04:00
This morning my mother and I decided to play our Google game. We think of a person that we've lost touch with and we look for links about their current lives. During the course of the hunt, we start looking for different people and AIM a surprise link. Well, my mother won this morning with a link involving a former piano teacher of mine. (Smoking Gun items are always a tragedy. Click here for the Playbill Online article)

Some of you know the intense nature of the tri-state area performing arts scene for school-aged children. I had prayers, fortune cookies, and car seating all planned before the bi-weekly trip to Mrs. Ivanov's. A bad lesson was a catastrophe, and not because I was embarrassed or because I let myself down; this woman was scary. However, she was one of the best in the state. Her students went on to win many competitions, not just the one she ran. As a mediocre school student who is secretly (or not so secretly) very competitive, I wanted to be the best (during the hours that I didn't want to quit) and Mrs. Ivanov was the way to go. She pushed many students to be better pianists than they would've been otherwise. I don't know how much I can fault her for that. However, Carnegie Hall? Someone else’s student? That's a little much.

You can read other people's comments about the incident here.

After recovering from my hysterical laughter about the Ivanov/O'Lone incident, I prepared for my first day of soccer in 14 years. When I arrived there were women with ages ranging from 18 - 40. We scrimmaged. I defended aggressively. I kicked the ball down the field a few times. I fell. Twice. Then I left.

I think soccer will be interesting. It's completely different crowd than the entertainment group. They were fun and competitive, and I didn't feel huge either. These woman were sturdy and played hard (No Mom. "Sturdy" isn't my way of saying lesbian, although there were a few out on the field.). I walked away feeling excited about playing soccer. I also walked away extremely sore.

My sore aching muscles were just screaming for a trip to the hot tub. While I was there I ended getting into a discussion about politics. Most people in entertainment are usually liberal, and those who aren't keep it to themselves. I was quite alarmed to meet a group of people who were all pro-life. They assumed that I was too. I was ok with the assumption for about 5 minutes. Then I had to say something. The discussion became a ping-pong game between me and another guy. I knew I should've gotten out of the water as soon as he said his favorite channel is Fox News Network because the reporting is so fair.

Killer Katrina may have missed me, but there are still very scary things going on in Florida. Oh yeah, the guy is also a gun carrying member of the NRA.

I Love Macs!

2005-08-25T19:05:00.000-04:00
Mac users with Tiger can follow this link to download Sudoku right on your desktop.

I will never do work on my computer again.

Wherever she lays her hat is her home....

2005-08-23T00:22:00.000-04:00
Like most of America, I've had real estate on my brain for the past 12 months. Even though I have a place to live, I have real estate on my brain.

Yesterday, Julia and I were watching an episode of America's Open House. Most of the hour featured homes way beyond my means. I wondered how people afford to live in these homes. In some of the country’s more expensive cities $450k meant living in a shoebox. If the median income is around $42,000, how are people able to afford to live in any kind of house? How do I rise above living a modest existence and attain a piece of the American Dream for myself? (Stop buying Gucci Shoes would probably be a good place to start.)

Fast forward to this evening and an interesting conversation I had with one of my dearest friends. We were talking about getting out of graduate school with tons of debt and trying to figure out how to buy a house. During the course of the conversation, we talked about American Wages. I had no idea so many people made close to minimum wage. We then talked about how we perceive our material lives. How could it be possible to make more than 100k a year and not be able to provide a decent living for yourself, to not be able to buy a decent house?

I began to think about my meager existence, and I realized that meager is relative. I live like a pauper compared to an investment banker. However this year, 90% of Americans would have rather collected my paycheck than theirs. Was the plan to purchase, not to rent, upon leaving the tour? Sure, but in the Orlando market purchasing was a bigger risk than I was willing to take. However, my current financial situation is ok. I can pay my bills, I do not live paycheck to paycheck, and I have the freedom to buy designer handbags, while meeting my savings goals.

Will I be a millionaire by 30? Probably not. If I had made smarter choices, I would be on my way, however that fact is not on my list of major disappointments. Perhaps, knowing that my career would be in the performing arts from a very young age prepared me mentally for not having a big salary. I do worry about how I’m going to get my first house, but like most things I obsess about, I will figure out a way to make it happen. The first step? Remembering I will not be Philip Banks overnight. The second step? Turn off HGTV.

So it's been awhile

2005-08-21T21:11:00.000-04:00
It's been a month since my last post. So many things have happened.

I left the tour and took up residence in Orlando. I'm sitting in bed surfing the web and I can see the fireworks out over my balcony.

Relief. Instead of being in my resort style apartment watching the display from my bedroom I could be in a musty basement seeing real people explode instead.

I must take a moment to appreciate my blessings.

And now, back to mindless surfing.

I Need You to Need Me

2005-07-31T13:47:00.000-04:00
My second to last day at Little Shop was filled with excitement. The day began with my mother and her book group coming to see the Matinee.

The author of the month was Debra Dickerson. It was quite fitting that the front page of Salon featured a piece written by her. The topic? Black women's sexuality in America.

Sounds kind of selacious, it wasn't at all. That's the problem. Every black woman that I know has experienced one of the things described in the article (read it here). Invisible. That's how I feel at times.

Fast forward a few hours. The moms are gone, and James and I are headed to the clubs.

The evening was filled with desperation. The black men were desperate to catch one of the scores of white girls dancing suggestively while they imbibed. The black women were desperate for any kind of attention. Any at all. What's new.

James and I had a great evening. I even have war wounds to prove it.

I'm going to Kentucky and we're going go to the Carnival....

2005-07-23T02:35:00.000-04:00

A dream is a wish your heart makes, and The Butterfly has a ton of heart. For the past 3 years she has wanted to come to Kentucky and go to the carnival. This year, Julia finally took her. I went along for the ride eventhough my face was seriously messed up, I wouldn't have missed Deja's return to the carnival for anything.

Click here for photos.

Oh Happy Day!

2005-07-22T16:07:00.000-04:00
Today was a great day. I received the best news I've heard in a really long time.

In addition, Rachel Kiwi turned me on to a new puzzle.

Mom, don't follow this link, it will only make you crazy.

But She's Homeless....

2005-07-14T02:16:00.000-04:00
Lisa Stansfield is not singing about me anymore.

I am no longer homeless. I will no longer receive strange looks from bouncers and rental car agents wondering how I have a Flordia driver's license with a New York address. In fact my time at rental car counters will be limited as well.

This must be the single woman's nesting phase.

So, Carole, Janelle, Lya, Gwen & Lisa and anyone who's opened their homes during one of my many periods of homelessness: You are welcome to stay in my apartment whenever you like.

Ahhh....A bed, a door, an address.

The American Dream

Milwaukee is not that bad

2005-07-13T02:24:00.000-04:00
I'll be honest. I was dreading the trip to Milwaukee. However, fate was on my side.

Two major events were in town the second week in July: Summerfest, the country's largest music festival, and the NAACP National Convention.

How did I get so lucky? Every single night there were friendly black people in every restaurant and bar in the city. I even had the chance to pay back a co-worker for an unforgotten uncomfortable racial situation. HA!

In addition, Fantasia Barrino was performing at Summerfest. I managed to wrestle my way to the 3rd row. Carrie who? Ruben what? Fantasia is the American idol.
The picture is a little blurry,

but that's her.

July 4th Continued

2005-07-06T01:50:00.000-04:00

Gucci wasn't the only reason my 4th of July was special this year.

This year I met a charming young man who was out on the town with his godmother for 4th of July fireworks at the Navy Pier. So in honor Mr. Charles Bredford, I am posting a few of his photographs.

Gucci=Independence

2005-07-05T20:05:00.000-04:00
Anyone who knows me well, knows that I talk to my mother every single day.

For the past 10 years or so, the July 4th conversation begins with either one of us saying, "What's 4th of July to a slave?!" Of course this is our bastardized version of the Frederick Douglas speech delivered to the Rochester Ladies Anti-Slavery Society.
We usually have a good laugh and talk about all the ways we actually are free.

This year was different. This Monday morning my mother was in the 4th of July spirit. I don't know if it was the fact that The Butterfly was at her house or that one of her best friends was moving into her first house. There were no "slaves weren't celebrating" jokes. In fact, I was in pretty high spirits. Knowing that my life was going to change shortly brought on such glee that I didn't need to make jokes. I wanted to buy new clothes to go with my new attitude. The plan was to meet up with James. The location? Gucci.

During my stay in Chicago, I had a tumultuous relationship with Gucci.

The first time I went into the store I was curious. I went in with Iris and James after seeing some of the company members’ purchases. The store was emotionally overwhelming to me. Beautiful handbags, clothing and shoes, many things emblazoned with signature Gs, however, the thought of paying $800 to be a walking advertisment was very hard for me to wrap my mind around. While browsing, the store went from half empty to full; most of the shoppers were black. There were shoppers who clearly had money; there were also shoppers that I questioned their financial stability. Did these people own houses? Did they have savings? None of my business, but I wondered. I walked into the store with my deflated self-worth and walked out knowing I had saved a down payment for a house and that was more important to me than any designer handbag. I was on my high horse.

So on Independence Day, with renewed confidence knowing that "the call" was behind me, I went into the Gucci Store to talk James out of gross consumption. While I was waiting for him to come to my conclusion (which he did), I spotted a pair of shoes. No way a girl with flat wide feet could get into a pair of Gucci shoes. Right?

By the time I left Gucci, I felt like a million bucks. Have you ever had on a pair of Gucci Shoes? I went from feeling like another nameless overweight black woman to feeling like Naomi Campbell in 2 seconds. What did I do? I bought the shoes.

They were a congratulatory Independence Day present. This July 4th, I came out of the deep self-loathing period I was experiencing. I knew that my life was going to change for the better, and my personal independence from the circumstances that were troubling to me would be behind me in a short time.
Maybe that is what Gucci means to everyone.

This is definitely an after picture.

The Angel Butterfly

2005-07-01T18:42:00.000-04:00
Here's a picture of The Butterfly. Julia hates the other picture on this page, so I thought I would post this one too.
She's so sweet.

I can't win for losing

2005-07-01T18:25:00.000-04:00
There's something so wrong about not posting anything between the picture and the title of the next post.

I'm not trying to imply anything. I just don't want to get in trouble with my mother again.

The Fat Black Girl

2005-06-30T17:48:00.000-04:00
I went to Six Flags on Monday, but today, I road the biggest roller coaster of them all. I logged on to post my fat black girl observations for today, but they seem somewhat trivial in the grand scheme of things.

The first incident happened this morning/afternoon when I was too embarrassed to leave my hotel room because of my now limited wardrobe; I looked at my tired clothing for hours before I actually had the strength to leave. Maybe it was a mistake to send all of those clothes home. Sorry guys.

The second was during my trip to Old Navy to put emergency finishing touches on said sad outfit. I had to return an item that was not the size as marked on the plastic strip and hanger. However, I did not have a receipt. All the drama that ensued was going to be a part of that rant. I left the store with the correct size in hand but still a little miffed. There is nothing I hate more than condescending bitches. I would have rather she told me no she wouldn’t exchange the item than listen to her go on with such attitude. This reminded me of an incident over the weekend. I figured they were both because I'm now black AND fat.

Whatever.

My next trip was to the bank to make my deposits. When the teller returned my slip that revealed that I was now $550 over my goal I was elated. With the Old Navy bitch completely forgotten, I called my parents to share the good news. I had a very interesting conversation with my father. He didn't know it, but he reminded me that life is short, and the things that seem big can become unimportant very quickly.

In this world of theater where drama is in super-overdrive and people make things seem as if their lives depend on it, a person can forget that there is life to really enjoy. Getting caught up in all of the drama and beating yourself up over it is not always worth it. Sometimes we need to cut our losses no matter how much of ourselves we've invested, just to save the one you sometimes forget…Yourself.

Dad I love you.
-Kimberly

Powerful Images

2005-06-26T11:28:00.000-04:00
I came across this site today.

What's on your postcard?

The Funniest Thing All Day

2005-06-25T01:24:00.000-04:00
Thanks to LaTonya for sending this to me.

This photo is entitled: Crack is One Helluva Drug

"And what? Whatcha gonna do now?!"

Hey, LaTonya. Is that your new house on the corner of Figeuroa?

Chicago 6/25/05

2005-06-25T00:49:00.000-04:00
I walked around Chicago today.

The Taste of Chicago was in the park across the street from the theater. Iris and I decided to take a stroll and take pictures as well. I realized that I have no pictures of myself on this blog. So here it is. Iris and I in front of Buckingham Fountain. If I had any doubt that this tour has been hard on me, this picture is proof.

It just supports the conclusions I came to in New Orleans.

Chicago is a great town. Finally. Here are the pictures from my first week in Chicago.

Creative Producers at Columbia

2005-06-25T00:00:00.000-04:00
Columbia University was in the NY Times.

Click the link below to read Jesse McKinley's article on the new Hal Prince/Columbia University "creative producers".

I wonder if it's too late for me.....

Click here to read the article (you will have to log in).

The Big Easy

2005-06-24T22:33:00.000-04:00

"I love heat, humidity and free flowing cocktails"

New Orleans was a welcomed change from Detroit. The weather was hot and the Saenger Theater was hotter.

The Hotel Monaco was beautiful and my 2 room suite featured a sorround sound entertainment center and a jacuzzi tub.

Personally, New Orleans was about facing some tough life/career decisions. There's nothing like a little heat and a lot of booze to make you think.

Click here for more New Orleans photos

Detrois May 30th - June 13th

2005-06-24T21:30:00.000-04:00
So Detroit.

I'm really glad I missed the first week. The hotel was weird. The theater was old. I went to Atlanta on my day off because I couldn't imagine spending a whole day in the city.

Click here for pics of Detroit

Maybe I should start a special section on gross hotels....

Are we going to see the Lion King?

2005-06-24T21:28:00.000-04:00
This is my 8-year-old cousin. Her name is Deja, but I like to call her The Butterfly.

She has been bugging me to see the Lion King for years.

December 2002, with comp tickets in hand on the way to see A Christmas Carol at The Madison Square Garden Theater.

The Butterfly: "We're going to NY? Are you taking me to see the Lion King?"

Kimberly: "No, not this time, but I think you're going to like this."
Meanwhile, I'm mentally making a note to take her to see the Lion King one day when I get the money. I felt like I let her down. Sucker.

Spring 2003 with comp tickets to A Year with Frog and Toad in hand (for those of you who forgot, it was the children's show featuring Mark Linn-Baker at the Cort Theatre, it wasn’t open very long).

On the Path train-
The Butterfly: "You're taking me to NY? Am I going to see a show? Are you taking me to the Lion King?"

Kimberly: "No, we're not going to see the Lion King, but I think you'll like this."

Turns out she loved the show, she sang the music all the way home to New Jersey, and continued singing for weeks. This is probably her favorite experience to date.

We had a similar trip to see 42nd Street. Honestly, I should've known better. I HATED the show; I have no idea why I thought she would like it. Tap dancing, sequins, and mirrors will only get you so far. By the end of the second number she groaned, "When is it going to be intermission?"

A year later, I tried it again. After finally landing my first 1st National Tour, I wanted to take The Butterfly to see the show I was working on. Here I am, walking down the streets of Midtown Manhattan, full of pride with The Butterfly in tow. She asked if we were going to see the Lion King. I said no, but I expected her to have a good time at Little Shop of Horrors. A plant, singing black girls, music with a beat and soul…Did she like it?

Not so much.

As soon as the blood red logo appeared on the show curtain, she said, "Aw man, I saw this movie."

Once again, she was praying for the intermission. Little Shop on Broadway was less than two hours including the intermission. I was faced with the fact that Broadway musicals aren't for everyone, and my idea that if you start young, they will grow up to appreciate the form. Boy, was I naive. I will have to figure out another way to entice young black people to support my career.

Anyway, this bring us to May of 2005, the day between returning from Puerto Rico and flying to LA. I made a stop in the New York Metropolitan area, picked up The Butterfly and we road the Path.

The Butterfly: "I know we're going to NY. Are you taking me to see the Lion King?"

Kimberly: "Yes"

I was so excited to be able to say yes. She was excited to finally go. We had a quick dinner and walked to the New Amsterdam where Simba loomed above us.

We took our seats in the middle of the orchestra on the aisle. The lights went down, the antelopes called, Rafiki appeared and the elephants came down the aisle, right next to The Butterfly. The moment was magical.

As the first act plods along, I find my mind wandering, I figured it was because I’d seen it so many times. Apparently Deja's mind was wandering too. When the lights finally came up for intermission I asked "How do you like it?"
She said, "It's ok. It's kinda boring." "Can we go to the bathroom or something?"

I think the most fun she had in the theater was in that bathroom.

After all those years of wanting to go, and all those years of wanting to take her, what did she enjoy most? Washing her hands in the bathroom.

Well, that's life. Deja won't be my new audience. AND I've taken her to see the Lion King. That circle in my life is now complete.