Black men make me tired

Ok.

I have to get this off my chest. This morning, I came across two websites that really got my blood boiling.

First.

What About Our Daughters

I go back and forth about how much I enjoy this website. At times I find the women screechy and I don't know that I actually agree with all of their messages and tactics.

What attracted me to them initially was the portrayal (and betrayal) of black women in the media. I wondered what we were teaching our children about the value of black women.

Every week they do a podcast with black bloggers on blogtalkradio.com. This week they discussed the New Hampshire primary returns.

Second.

I came across Dear Black Man: I'm Not Angry, I'm just mad as hell .

Intriguing.

The website features stories about ways black women can relate to black men in a more meaningful manner.

Nice. I guess.

After further review I discovered that it's not black women who are mad as hell, it's the black men.

The site features an open letter section where black men can air all of their tired laundry.

How are these two things connected?

Well, on this week's WAOD roundtable a caller decided to voice his concerns with the fact that these ladies were not Obama supporters. This was a surprise to the ladies because they are not against Obama, they are just trying to figure out the best candidate for them will be.

The caller (a black man) asserted that all black women should be supporting Obama, we should put our gender aside because that is not important and that Obama needs to be our choice because he is the first viable black candidate. Professor Tracy took issue with the request that she forget her gender to support a candidate that might not be best for her well-being. Another blogger then challenged Mr. Black Man to explain the issues that Obama supported that would positively change their lives. (I'm paraphrasing). Mr. Black Man could only come up with He's not Jesse, he's not Al, he's not Shirley Chisholm. Then he was asked what issues make him, (Mr. Black Man) support Obama. Same story. First black man as president.

hmmmm.......

As this was going on in the background I was reading this:

...Now she wants to be independent instead of us teaming up to build a dynasty. I really feel that BM woman wants to lead the BM and control all aspects of black life. More times than not when a BW acheives socalled success there was a man in the picture to help make it happen. The BW wants her own materialism. Once a BM has been burned in this way he very seldom ever trust another BW. Do BW hate BM? I actually have been able to build my businesses successly with out her. I never would have beleived that she was the one whom did want me to succeed because she wanted her own recognition. Now she now one the 70% of BW looking for a good man.

Here's my thing, I feel like everywhere I turn, I read/see/hear something that speaks to the problem with black women:

1. We're too educated
2. We're too outspoken or we have an attitude
3. We're too independent (A condition caused by the abandonment of the black family en masse by black men, even if you weren't a victim of said loss, you still consume it as part of the culture at large)
4. We don't care what happens to men now because we have so much for ourselves.

All of this is usually followed by "Who are you going to date now, you've got so much for yourselves now your all alone. Ha!" or "Welcome to the 70% of black women who are unmarried!"

Well now wait a second. If you really don't care about us, and we don't deserve your attention, and you're better off with out us and that's why you only date white women, then why do you need us to vote for Obama without questioning his position?

Why do you need us to not have our defenses up when you step to us in the club or at the bar?

Why do you need us to support you financially when the going gets tough?

Why do you need us to subvert all of our goals and aspirations just so that we can make YOU FEEL LIKE A MAN? Act like a man! Are you a man? Why is that not enough? Why must black women act like sub-humans in order for us to be feminine?

Why, after all of this screaming that we aren't good enough, that we aren't worthy, that we aren't pretty, that we are worthless; are we supposed to support what any black man does, just because they are a black man. This is not a two-way street, and I resent expectation. (Oh I could go on and on about expectations).

I'm done.